Holiday Stress and Caregiving

~Michael Plontz

While everyone else is enjoying the hustle and bustle and the joy of the holiday season, there are many caregivers out there who just want the whole thing over with.  Caregiving creates a level of stress unmatched by most endeavors.  Add to that the extra stress of family gatherings, gift buying, cooking, and other obligations and it is almost unbearable.  How can caregivers better cope with this stress on top of stress?

The following tips may help you weather the holidays much better:

  1. Start your own tradition. Often we feel bound by past holiday traditions, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Instead of having 20 family members and guests in your home, and cooking for all of them, try a different approach.  Suggest that someone else host Passover or Easter dinner. Or, if your home is the only appropriate one, enlist the help of friends and relatives for everything from cleaning to preparing food.  A potluck is a great idea—you can even assign specific dishes to ensure that a complete dinner is provided.

  2. There are great ways to shop non-traditionally as well. The Internet is a fantastic way to shop for food and gifts without leaving home. Another way to shop from home is using catalogs (many people feel uncomfortable about putting credit card numbers out in cyberspace). If you would rather go out, use the catalogs to make lists of specific gifts for each person. That way you know exactly where to go and exactly what to get.

  3. Make sure you leave enough time to enjoy the holidays. It shouldn’t be all about the hustle and bustle.

  4. The motto “Everything in moderation” should be your guide through the holidays. There are many temptations abundant throughout the season—alcohol, sweets and rich food. Go ahead. Have some. Just don’t over-indulge. It may make you sick or uncomfortable even through the following day.

  5. Be prepared for unexpected circumstances. Something may come up, and probably will, so what can you do? If you can, change the situation. If you can’t, accept it and move on. You cannot control life no matter how planned out you believe you have things. Laugh a lot…

  6. Try to keep up on your regular exercise routine, or start one, during the holidays. Walking five times a week is a great way to stay in shape. There is also something about pounding the pavement that helps release frustrations and clears your head. If your looking out your window and the snow is flurrying and drifting, find an alternative. Many health clubs have indoor tracks. If that doesn’t appeal to you, check with the nearest shopping mall. Some open early just for walkers.

  7. Ideally caregivers should have a daily, weekly, monthly and yearly break.

Daily-Half an hour of yoga, meditation, needlepoint, reading, etc.
Weekly-A couple of hours spent away from the house at the mall, library, coffeehouse, etc.
Monthly-An evening out with your friends, a play, a concert, etc.
Yearly-A well-planned (and well-deserved) vacation.

Planning ahead for these breaks is imperative. You may need to arrange for respite care for your loved one.

It can be done. You can care for your loved one, attend to your daily activities, and enjoy the holidays. We all do what we can, and nobody should expect more than that from us. Especially us. Happy Holidays.

In Raleigh, NC contact Raleigh Geriatric Care Management, www.rgcmgmt.com

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Stress and the Holidays: Coping Strategies to Keep you Sane

By Helen Hunter,

Every year, the media bombards us with advertisements showing the “happy family” gathering for the holidays. People from different generations are together, having a wonderful time, sharing traditions of old and creating new ones as well.

It is not that way, though, for a great number of individuals. For those who don’t have families of their own, or for those who live alone and have relatives living far away, holidays often bring heartbreak and depression. Those who have been used to family celebrations in the past and no longer have that to look forward to cannot accept the “change” in the tradition, especially if they keep hearing about others who are getting together with their own families.

There are two things to remember that can help get you through the holidays. The first thing to realize is that it is okay to cry. This can be a tough time for many. It is natural to feel depressed when your friends are having the ideal family gathering. Allow yourself to express your inner feelings.

The second thing to remember is to control the holidays, do not let them control you. This requires planning. If you know that you will be alone on the holiday, start planning ahead for what you will do. Here are some suggestions for things you can do to sidestep the holiday blues:

  1.  If you cannot be with family, try to spend time with friends or neighbors instead.
  2. Get away from the source of the depression. If your home reminds you of past holidays spent with a loved one, go on a cruise, or take a vacation to another part of the country, or go abroad.
  3. Get involved with an activity. Volunteer at a local senior center, church or community center that serves meals on the holiday, or give your services to a hospital. If you know that someone will be alone and cannot get out for the holiday, visit. If the person lives far away and you cannot physically visit, make a phone call. In helping those who are less fortunate than yourself, you can forget some of your own troubles.
  4. Invite others who are also alone to your home to share the holiday. You can prepare a meal for them, or you can go out to a restaurant. Company always helps ease depression.

Be gentle to yourself, especially if you have recently lost a loved one. If you do not feel like celebrating, don’t! If you do wish to celebrate, keep it simple. Remember the TRUE reason that we celebrate the holidays!

The important point to remember here is that if the old traditions cause heartbreak and depression, change the tradition – start a new one!

Also, be sure to review your expectations and be realistic. Not everyone is jolly, generous and loving all through the holiday season. As Wayne A. Van Kampen from the Bethesda PsycHealth Reporter wrote, “ Somehow (during the holidays) persons feel pushed into hiding, covering over, or denying the reality of sadness, fear and tension. Perhaps what is needed most is simply a more honest embracing of ourselves, others, and the realities of life.” Not everyone will have a happy family gathering just because it is the holiday season. Old resentments are likely to resurface, no matter how hard we try, when people are thrown together for an extended period.

In addition, there are a number of strategies that can be used in planning the holiday celebration.

These strategies include the following:

  • Delegate responsibilities and activities so that one person is not taking on more than can be accomplished without help.
  • Do not assume responsibility for the entire household’s holiday happiness.
  • Work minute by minute on your attitude. Postpone becoming angry and show understanding and calmness. This technique should be used not only during the holiday period, but every day!
  • Any task that you have chosen to do, whether it be the cooking, cleaning, gift wrapping, card addressing, organizing, decorating or shopping, is to be viewed as a choice that you made. Try to have fun in tackling these tasks, which will make the holiday easier and keep your spirits positive.
  • Start traditions that make the most sense to you in your life now. It doesn’t always have to be done the same way every year.
  • Do things together as a family that you all truly enjoy.

Make the holiday season a time for you and your loved ones to have fun and to share special memories. When the entire season is over, sit down, relax and count your blessings. Remind yourself as to how lucky you are. When you make an effort to have a joyous, stress-free holiday, you can avoid the stress. The key is to plan ahead, and to ask for and accept help from others.

Raleigh Geriatric Care Management www.rgcmgmt.com

Leave a comment

Filed under adult children of aging parents, Adult day care, aging drivers, Aging In Place, Alzheimer's Disease, anxiety and the elderly, assessments, bathing and seniors, care giving, care planning, caregiver burnout, caregiving, caregiving and the holidays, clinical trial studies, dementia, Depression and the elderly, driving retirement, elder care raleigh nc, elder nutrition, employee stress, family meetings, Geriatric Care Management, Having a conversation, humor, Long Term Care Insurancee, long term care planning, medication reminders, moving in with family, NC, Nursing Homes, nursing homes and assisted living, paying for home care, Power of Attorney, Raleigh, respite, Sandwich Generation, senior care, senior driving, Seniors and driving, sibling relationships, support groups, tax tips for seniors, travel with seniors

Holiday Family Gatherings: A Time for Enjoyment & Meaningful Discussions

Once again we’re preparing for families to come together over the holiday season. We long to see how our seniors are doing, especially those who are far away from us and living independently.

Are they ok? Have they been eating well? Is the house in good repair? Are they paying all the bills on time? Have they been keeping things from us?

Hopefully, during our visit with them to celebrate a time of family sharing we will be able to observe them for any signs that they need a little bit more help. There are many things we should be on the lookout for in their home, their own health and appearance, the car, the home and the yard.

Another important thing we should do while we are visiting our senior loved ones is talk.

“Talk about what specifically,” you ask?

Serious Discussions with Parents & Other Senior Loved Ones

We might find some discussions hard to begin and others may be taboo in your family or culture. Unfortunately, once your parents reach a certain age (and you as well) it is recommended that these uncomfortable discussions happen and the answers clearly brought out into the open.

Whether you want to or not, some things are just better to know.

  1. Do they have any advance directives? Is there a living will created about which you should know? What are their wishes for end of life care? Do they have a DNR or a healthcare proxy to speak for them if they can’t? It is important to hear directly from them what they anticipate their end of life to be. What if they get into an accident or have a medical emergency? If you don’t talk openly about this eventuality it will be more difficult, especially if you are at a long distance, to make decisions in an emergency without prior knowledge. Do they have burial plans already?
  2. If they have executed these documents, where are they kept? Can you get a copy? Does the doctor know about them and do they have a copy on file? Do they need to be updated?
  3. If they don’t have them created, can you do this during your visit so all their wishes are documented in case of an emergency? Now is a good time to get important documents executed while you are there to get the necessary information. These decisions must be made before your senior is no longer competent to make his wishes known legally.
  4. Do they have a will? Who is the executor? Where is the will kept – who is the attorney? Where are the contact numbers for lawyers, doctors, and other people if you need them?
  5. Are they still competent to drive safely? Has the car been damaged since your last visit? Take a ride as a passenger to test them, even if it is without them knowing your purpose for going for an ice cream cone together.
  6. Are they declining in functional status? Does it look like they are having difficulty keeping themselves neat and tidy? Are their clothes clean and in good repair? Are they shaving? Do they have unexplained bruises? Are they appearing thin or weak? Are they having trouble balancing themselves when they walk or get up from sitting? Do they need more help?
  7. Is their home still adequate to age in place? Is it where they want to be or would they rather come closer to you, go to a senior living area or move to a smaller home that is easier to care for alone? Some seniors enjoy living in an assisted living facility where they have less responsibility and more opportunity for social engagement. Is their current home accessible to transportation services if they can no longer drive? Is their home in good repair with adequate safety modifications to prevent accidents? Can you work on some modifications while you visit and schedule other more involved upgrades for when you are not there?
  8. Are they depressed or isolated? Some seniors choose to stay home and reduce their visits to places, people and events that they once frequented for a variety of reasons. Perhaps they are afraid to drive, don’t want to go alone, can’t leave the house for too long for fear of needing a restroom quickly, or have side effects of medications that keep them from being active. Seniors need to be social, mentally stimulated and engaged to prevent boredom and loneliness. It might be a good time to get them reconnected, take them to the senior center and arrange transportation if necessary. Find things for them to be active and involved from home. Set up some technology and teach them to use it so they can use social media, Skype or Facetime to engage with distant family and friends.
  9. What about their finances? Do they have enough money to meet their needs? Are they paying their bills? Do they have a supplemental insurance policy or long term care policy which you should be aware? Are they struggling to make ends meet? Are they getting the benefit of all — well — benefits to which they are entitled?

~by Kathy Birkett

Assistance is offered with Raleigh Geriatric Care Management in North Carolina www.rgcmgmt.com to help you and your aging loved ones navigate the myriad of senior resources and services.  lwatral@rgcmgmt.com for more information. 

Leave a comment

Filed under adult children of aging parents, Adult day care, aging drivers, Aging In Place, Alzheimer's Disease, anxiety and the elderly, assessments, bathing and seniors, care giving, care planning, caregiver burnout, caregiving, caregiving and the holidays, dementia, Depression and the elderly, driving retirement, elder care raleigh nc, elder nutrition, employee stress, family meetings, Geriatric Care Management, Having a conversation, humor, Long Term Care Insurancee, long term care planning, medication reminders, moving in with family, NC, Nursing Homes, nursing homes and assisted living, paying for home care, Power of Attorney, Raleigh, respite, Sandwich Generation, senior care, senior driving, Seniors and driving, sibling relationships, support groups, tax tips for seniors, travel with seniors

Caring For An Elder From Far Away: Geriatric Care Managers

by Terry Weaver

As an adult, balancing work and elder care can be a challenge whether your parent lives next door or out of state. Add children to this, and the situation becomes compounded. Legal, financial and long-term planning for elder care is crucial, and long distance caregivers need to prepare for travel and time off from work. Face the facts, most older adults want to stay right where they are. They do not want to relocate, even if it means being closer to family. If this is what the elder wishes, as the child, you must respect their wishes.

For people who work and care for an aged family member, (particularly when that family member lives far away), one solution is to hire a professional geriatric care manager. A geriatric care manager is a professional who specializes in assisting older people and their families with long-term care arrangements. Care managers have a minimum of a bachelor’s degree or substantial equivalent training in gerontology, social work, nursing, counseling, psychology or a related field.

Prolonged illness, disability or simply the challenges of aging can significantly alter the lifestyle of older adults. Daily responsibilities can become difficult. Efficient coordination of medical, personal and social service resources can enhance the quality of life for older adults and their caregivers.

Geriatric care mangers assist older adults in maintaining their independence at home and can ease the transition to a new setting, if needed. Geriatric care managers also help:

  • Conduct care planning assessments to identify problems, eligibility for assistance, and need for services.

  • Review financial, legal, or medical issues and offer referrals to geriatric specialists to avoid future problems and conserve assets.

  • Act as a liaison to families at a distance, making sure things are going well and alerting families to problems.

  • Assist with moving an older person to or from a retirement complex, assisted living facility, or nursing home.

  • Offer counseling and support.

  • How do you know when it is time to call a professional? Look for these signs.

  • Is your loved one losing weight for no known reason? Do they fall?

  • Is the home unkempt and becoming unsafe? How are meals made? Who pays the bills?

  • Are they able to(and do they) maintain a neat appearance? Has drinking become a problem?

  • Is it safe for your parents to drive? If not, who does the driving for them?

  • Has there been a sudden memory loss or increased confusion?

Of course in order to answer these questions, you’ll have to pay a visit to your long distance loved one, or rely on information from a relative or friend who is close to that loved one.  There is no reason to feel guilty about being far away as long as you are doing everything that you can to help.  In Raleigh, NC, visit Raleigh Geriatric Care Management, www.rgcmgmt.com 

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Creating Fun for Caregivers and Frail Seniors

By Lynn Howe

Your confined-to-home (or assisted living or nursing home) parent, just wants to have fun! You are focused on their safety, finances, medical treatment, medications, privacy, nutrition and therapy. You busy yourself with monitoring their progress (or decline) and doing everything in your power to keep them comfortable. You worry about their reduced energy level, increasing fatigue, physical weakness and variable mental status. But do you know how important it is for them to just have fun? To laugh deeply, live in the moment, to briefly not be just old and frail, to forget pain?

OK, so what can you do? I know that you are thinking, well, they can’t do that much, but you might be surprised at all the options. Too often thoughtful families accommodate so much to their senior’s weakening state that they overlook how much they can do and enjoy! While it’s good to try to bring the world to them with visits, letters, phone calls and email, it’s also important and possible to keep bringing them out in the world. Of course, it may involve more work for you — transporting walker or wheelchair, assisting in/out of cars and doors, walking slowly, negotiating steps carefully, finding bathrooms, keeping him/her dry, warm (or cool) — so be prepared for a different pace and smaller goals. And some cajoling might be needed to just get going.

Mini-field trips

Seniors look forward to having a day out, but as they age, they don’t have the stamina or mobility for trips to fascinating museums, over-stimulating casinos, monster malls, giant sports stadiums, wooded parks, loud modern restaurants, etc. But they may be able to go out for an hour or two. My mom adored a simple trip to the supermarket — colorful flowers, fanciful balloons, acres of fresh, bright produce, bakery smells, energetic families with huge carts. She pushed her walker along, senses on overload, straying down enticing aisles. We didn’t buy a thing. But it was an hour that she talked about for days – a new topic of discussion with her nursing home buddies.
Another day we drove one short mile to a local antique shop. “I had those gold Fostoria glasses,” she pointed out. “Your dad and I would stop at the Fostoria factory store on trips to see my brother in Washington, DC.” Talk about the glassware led to reminiscing about her deceased brother, until she0interrupted herself; “Look at the quilts – just like Grandmother’s.” And so on, pushing her walker forward toward the next memory. After about an hour, she had had enough and home we went.

The first trip to a small local department store just before Christmas involved a little arm twisting. But once there, lights, perfume, soft velvety fashions and just ahead a decorated Christmas tree, worked their magic. She wheeled ahead, touching, smelling, exclaiming. Onward through silky lingerie, cute children’s clothes and glittering jewelry. At about the hour mark, like Cinderella, she was done. She relived it all week.

Recently she and I went to a small jewelry store 10 minutes from her home – she had favorite rings that needed resizing. Instead of just taking them for her, I invited her to come along. For the first time in a long time she became the customer, the center of attention. Soon she asked for a chair, her shopping done. But for her it was a big accomplishment, an errand, like in the old days she so misses.

My father-in-law loved an afternoon drive looking at properties we were considering purchasing. He was curious about these houses we described, their yards, their roofs, the neighborhoods. Since we didn’t even bring his wheelchair or get out of the car, it was like a guided tour. “I’ve been in that house” he’d say. “This was always a good neighborhood” he’d remember. “Let’s see what they are building on that hill.” Other mini trips for him were to the cemetery where his wife was buried, their first house in that area and a volunteer organization they founded. He remembered being a neighbor, a businessman, a father and a contributer to the community.
Other ideas might be a quilt shop for a former quilter, a hardware store for the ardent handyman, the library, bakery, family style restaurant, plant store or flower shop.

Fun at home

You don’t have to go out to have fun of course. Opportunities are right there in their home (or facility) to have fun and fight boredom.

Stage a sing-along to his/her favorite music. Play the music loud and clear.

Get all dressed up and take some photo portraits – use them for family gifts.

Rent/borrow movies for slow afternoons – old ones, funny ones, scary ones.

Have a deck of cards on hand and play the old familiar games – gin rummy, hearts, war.

Scrabble is great fun with grandkids.

Keep a puzzle going if you have a spare tabletop – people coming in always get engaged and stay to talk

Get out of the room – visit other residents, attend sing-alongs, presentations, craft sessions, chair exercises lunch groups.

Pull out a family album – get them to identify the older ones you may have forgotten and take notes or audiotape the stories you hear. Family photos trigger floods of memories.

Pick a theme for the week or month. Decorate his/her room and door. It will bring people in to check it out and or conversation.

Rearrange furniture and pictures – just for stimulation.

Order in or pick up some favorite foods that aren’t on the regular menu – hot dogs for my mom, milkshakes for my husband’s dad.

Manicures and pedicures are a special treat too. Have candy for drop-in guests and gifts for visitors – order online; think about birthday and holiday gifts and ‘shop’ on line.

Make up a Christmas, holiday or birthday wish list from the web – send it to family members. So think about what your loved one has always enjoyed, listen to what they talk about, look around your neighborhood and give it a try!

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Aging In Place, A Real Choice

~Helen Hunter

As people age, they may be faced with making the decision as to whether to move out of their existing home where they have raised family. Too often, these homes are not conducive to the physical challenges that elders may face in their advancing years. A recent study of aging baby boomers shows an overwhelming propensity to remain in their current homes after retirement. As a result, many home builder and housing associations throughout the country are organizing educational activities to highlight programs and support services, such as healthcare, chore services and transportation, which will enable elders to age comfortably in place.

Consumers who plan to age in place should take proactive steps to modify their homes while they are still financially and physically able. The National Association of Home Builders recommends the following modifications:

There should be at least one bedroom and one bathroom on the first floor. First floor living is a high priority for older adults. Having a full bath and a master bedroom on the main floor makes it easier for those who have trouble climbing stairs.

There should be conveniently located and easy to use controls and handles. Raised electrical outlets, electrical switches positioned slightly lower, and thermostats with large, easy to read numbers are perfect for older people. Installing lever handles makes it easier for people with arthritis to open doors.

There should be no-step entrances. Having at least one entry without steps creates easier access for everyone, regardless of ability. It may be appropriate to install a wheelchair ramp in at least one entrance as well.

There should be extra maneuvering space throughout the home. Wider doors and hallways can make a home more accessible.

There should be drawers instead of shelves in the lower kitchen cabinets, which would accommodate a person in a wheelchair. In addition, shelves under the kitchen sink and stovetop can be converted from storage space to knee space for those who prefer to clean and cook while seated. Changing knobs on the kitchen cabinets to D-shaped pulls that are a contrasting color to the cabinet doors make it much easier for the older person to grasp. Changes to the sink area can include changing the faucet to the single-handle lever type and installing an extra-long hose for the faucet sprayer. This would allow the older person to fill large pots that are sitting on the stove.

Bathrooms should be equipped with safety features. One of the most important rooms in the house to design correctly in order to allow homeowners to age in place is the bathroom. Grab bars, a bath chair and a raised toilet seat can provide stability for the older person and prevent falls. Falls in the bathroom or on the stairs are the second leading cause of accidents for elders, just behind automobile accidents. It would be prudent to invest in enlarging at least one bathroom in the home. A larger bathroom makes maneuvering easier for people with walkers, crutches and wheelchairs.

For those who have to handle daily climbing of stairs, it is very important to have proper lighting on stairways. Eyesight changes as people age. Most of the older homes don’t have adequate lighting on stairways. Therefore, installing lights with adjustable controls, or dimmers, can help prevent glare and ensure proper lighting. Task lighting is also preferred for cooking, reading and shaving, while softer light is appropriate for night trips to the bathroom.

There are some elders who will choose to move to a new home when they retire, many of which will have a number of the above features in place. Many others, however, will not have the ability to make such a move, for a number of reasons. By planning ahead, and making some home modification changes now, elders can choose to remain in their home, comfortable in their surroundings, aging in place, maintaining their independence and dignity.

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

The Sandwich Generation

~By Kathleen Bogolea, MS

Since the adoption of the National Family Caregiver Support Program in late 2000, there have been numerous news articles and points of interests written about the family caregiver and their many different roles within the family and the community. Roughly, it is estimated that American families provide 80 to 90 percent of all in-home long term care services for their aging family members, disabled adult children and other loved ones.  These services may include assistance with activities of daily living (ADL’s), medical services coordination, medical supervision, administration of medications and assistance with financial, legal, spiritual and emotional concerns.  These services are priceless and the family caregivers that provide them often go unrecognized and over utilized which can lead to great stress for the family caregiver.  In contrast, if these same services were to be provided by our national health care system, it would be estimated at approximately 250 billion dollars per year.

Recently, and of particular interest, there is a new buzz around a subset of caregivers known as the  “Sandwich Generation”.  These are caregivers who find themselves squeezed in between caring for younger loved ones such as children, and their elder parents or other elder family members.  While the Sandwich Generation is not a new form of family caregiving, these caregivers are receiving a long overdue peaking of interest within American society.

Currently, the typical American Sandwich Generation Caregiver is in her mid-forties, married, employed and cares for her family and an elderly parent, usually her mother. With this said, it is important to note that there are more and more men that find themselves in a caregiving role and even squeezed in between the generations.  It is also important to note that there is an ever-growing segment of family and sandwich generation caregivers that live in rural communities. Unlike caregivers living in urban and industrial areas, rural caregivers may find themselves removed from readily available and professionally organized supportive services and care networks.  They may also find themselves not only carrying the normal burdens that are associated with providing care for a loved one, but also they may be faced with challenges such as geographic barriers to resources and isolation from other caregivers, family members or informal supports.  This lack of service availability, care networks, and isolation from other caregivers and family members can add to caregiver stress, burnout, and depression. 

The demanding role of being a caregiver spreads across all racial, gender, age and ethnic boundaries.  Some of the common stressors that affect both urban and rural sandwich generation caregivers are:

  • How do I split my time between my children/family and my elder loved one?

  • How much of my time is too much time in each caregiving role?

  • How do you find the time for my marriage?

  • How do you find the time for myself?

  • How do I keep the generational peace between my kids and my elder loved one?

  • How do I find the resources that I need for my self and my loved one?

  • How do I combat my feelings of isolation?

  • Guilt, Guilt and more Guilt for not having enough time to accomplish all that “should” be doing. 

To counter act some of these stressors, here are some caregiver tips that may help sandwich generation caregivers along the way:

Hold A Family Meeting
At this meeting, discuss the many different caregiving tasks that need to be accomplished each day or week.  Set a task list for family members to complete each day/week.  Set mutual expectations of how the many tasks of caregiving will be accomplished.  Caregiving is often a one-person show but it does not need to be if you have family support.  The family meeting also allows for family members to participate and share in the valuable gift of caregiving and this can be very rewarding.

Communication
Encourage children and elders to communicate with one another.  During the family meeting, make sure that all family members have a chance to talk about their thoughts and feelings.

Ask For Assistance
Make a point of picking up the telephone and spending time calling resources such as your local Area Agency on Aging, a hospital social worker, a physician or church. The Internet can also be a wonder resource finding tool.  Never be afraid to ask for assistance when you need to, you may be surprised at who has been waiting to help you.

Take Time To Care For Yourself
Too often I meet caregivers who are run down and even sick because they have not taken time to care for themselves.  Sure, no one can take care of your loved ones as well as you do but you must care for yourself if you want to continue to care for your loved one.  This is not an act of selfishness, it is actually an act of great giving.

Take time every day to “check-in” with yourself, even if it is only 10 minutes.  This should be your protected time.  Enjoy this time by reading, listening to music, exercising or whatever you like to do.

  • Remember to laugh at the funny things in life.

  • Take time to be “in” your marriage.

  • Listen to your body. If your body is telling you to slow down, or that something is not right, seek medical advice.  Too often we do not listen to our bodies no matter how loudly they may be talking to us.

Every caregiver and caregiving situation is unique but there are always common factors which bridge these situations and caregivers together.  It is easy to become lost in the caregiving that you are providing but remember that support can come from many different sources and in many different ways.  For those of you who are squeezed in the sandwich generation please know that you are not alone and that assistance is often only a telephone call or internet site away. Your local Family Caregiver Support Program is here to help you.

Leave a comment

Filed under adult children of aging parents, Alzheimer's Disease, assessments, care giving, care planning, caregiver burnout, caregiving, caregiving and the holidays, elder care raleigh nc, employee stress, family meetings, Geriatric Care Management, Having a conversation, humor, moving in with family, NC, Nursing Homes, paying for home care, Power of Attorney, Raleigh, respite, Sandwich Generation, senior care, sibling relationships, support groups