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What is an Aging Life Care Professional ™?

We are still the same, but our name has changed to better reflect what we do and who we are. Our national association, formerly known as National Association of Professional Care Managers (NAPGCM), is now  the Aging Life Care Association™ (ALCA) and care managers are now refered to as Aging Life Care Experts™.

Conflicting demands on your heart, time, and energy can make it hard to care for an aging relative. If this sounds familiar, you could benefit from the services of an aging life care expert.

An aging life care expert provides relief. They work with you and your family member to develop a realistic care plan. The goal of the plan is to maximize your loved one’s independence, safety, and quality of life. A solid care plan addresses family resources. This includes making sure you are not called upon to do more than you are able.

An aging life care expert is a guide and an advocate. These experts are typically trained in the health professions or social work. Many have specialties in elder care. They bring to their role an understanding of the

  • local healthcare system;
  • emotional and physical challenges of aging and/or disability;
  • difficulties of adult children juggling work and family;
  • common legal and financial issues that arise in later life;
  • local housing options and other senior or disabled services.

Aging life care experts use a holistic approach. They begin with a thorough assessment of needs and capabilities. They can often resolve uncertainties and dispel family disagreements. Their emotional support may help your loved one come to terms with this new phase of life.

An aging life care expert’s input may save you time and money. After looking at money and other family resources, they can recommend appropriate housing situations. They can identify veteran assistance and other benefits. They can avoid duplication of medical services and potentially catch problems before a crisis blooms. They can also monitor the quality of care.

An aging life care expert works independently as the client’s advocate.They are not paid through referral fees. Nor are they employees of hospitals or insurance companies. In some cases, their services can be reimbursed by long-term care insurance.

If you think you and your loved one could benefit from the services of an aging life care expert, give us a call at Raleigh Geriatric Care Management, 919-803-8025, http://www.rgcmgmt.com

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Considerations for Caregivers

By Arthur N. Gottlieb

Caregiving is not for everyone. Remember, it’s not about you. If the relationship is too emotionally charged or patience is not your best virtue, find someone else to take over the primary role of caregiver.

It is important to reflect upon your motivations for being a caregiver and to make an honest assessment of your limitations.

As a caregiver you may at times feel powerless and sad. But an experience laden with difficulty may also provide opportunities to strengthen relationships with loved ones, and for the development of one’s own personal and spiritual growth.

About Visits
Focus on the quality of interactions with a loved one, not on the quantity.

Consistency and predictability of visitations are important, especially for the homebound.

Communication Skills
Learn the healer’s art of “bearing witness.” This means listening empathically and suppressing the urge to intervene with solutions.

When speaking to someone in bed or in a wheelchair, sit down or otherwise lower yourself so that you are at the same eye level as they are. This will distinguish you from others who remain standing, essentially looking and speaking down to them with the unspoken but inherent power differential this implies.

Choose your battles wisely. Attempting to address an irrational situation with rationality is generally futile, and will increase conflict with no resolution

The hearing impaired are often too prideful to admit that they haven’t heard most of what you just said, and are hopeful that they can eventually figure it out.

Those with mild cognitive impairment are still quite capable of comprehension, but the thought process may have slowed down a little. Be patient and speak slowly.

Restoring Dignity
Asking for a senior’s opinion about a non-provocative issue may offer them an opportunity to feel respected and still relevant.

At the dinner table when others are present, if a person needs to have their food cut for them, discreetly take the plate back into the kitchen and cut it there. This will add an unspoken but important element of dignity for those being cared for.

Residential and Financial Concerns
The attitudes and behaviors of many seniors are oftentimes driven by an unspoken fear of abandonment.

When parents do not feel that their children have made wise decisions for themselves, they are naturally hesitant to turn over financial control to them.

It was not uncommon for senior women to have deferred to their husbands’ judgment when choices were being made about financial and property issues. If now widowed, they may feel more comfortable acting in accordance with someone else’s say-so for important decision-making.

It may be illuminating to discover what memories a senior has of his or her own parent’s convalescence. What would they, as caregivers, have done differently? Had they promised themselves they would never go to a “nursing home”?

When a senior is facing the prospect of moving to a continuing care or assisted living community, speak to them about what they think this will be like. Many will have a stark vision of facilities from many years ago when options were relatively limited.

About Moodiness
Seniors will experience good days and bad days due to effects of pain, adjustment to medications and or emotional issues.

Seniors who seem short-tempered may be responding to the frustrating lack of control of not being able to think as quickly, and remember as well, as they once had.

Psychology of Seniors
Understand and be prepared to recognize the issues that trigger depression and anxiety for seniors.

Be sensitive to anniversary depressions. Birthdays, anniversaries, and major holidays evoke memories of those who have passed, and independence lost.

For most, losing control of physical functioning is difficult. Experiencing the steady loss of friends and relatives leads to sadness and isolation. For those with dementia, witnessing the gradual loss of one’s own self can be the ultimate loneliness.

If a senior is grieving the loss of a loved one they think died yesterday, even if that person actually died years ago, their grief will be as deep and painful as though it just happened.  This is legitimate suffering and must be handled with empathy.

Oftentimes, a parent will have a set of expectations of how they deserve to be treated by their children based on the sacrifices they made on behalf of their own parents. When children do not meet these expectations, resentment, depression and various forms of acting out behavior are the result.

Some seniors harbor lifelong prejudices that were carefully concealed. It can be quite distressing for a caregiver to discover that their parent has “all of a sudden” developed a shocking taste for racial bias. The gradual loss of mental functioning allows one to become “dis-inhibited”; thoughts, formerly suppressed due to social constraints, are now out in the open. This applies for latent sexual desires as well, especially for men.

Denial
If the person you are caring for continually puts off medical diagnosis, they are using the defense of denial in the service of their fear. If they are never diagnosed, then they never have to face the reality of being sick.

For Senior Men
More often than not, senior men went along with the social arrangements made by their wives. If a man becomes a widower, he may feel out of place socializing with others on his own. Additionally, since women outnumber men of this age group, a man may feel he is betraying the memory of his wife when engaging in social situations involving mostly women.

Religion and Spirituality
It is important to understand what a person’s religious or spiritual beliefs are. Does he or she believe in an afterlife? Are they concerned over what is in store for them when their mortal life ends? Are they disillusioned  or angry with God?

Restore and Maintain Balance
It is essential for you, as a caregiver, to leave time for your own introspection and emotional balance. Engage in activities that serve to cleanse toxins and stress from the body and spirit.

Engage the help of others when necessary to de-stress and achieve perspective.

Rest and relaxation are critical in order to prevent “caregiver burnout.”

Raleigh Geriatric Care Management Aging Life Care Professional  www.rgcmgmt.com

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Geriatric Care Manager—>Aging Life Care Professional

WHAT IS AN AGING LIFE CARE PROFESSIONAL?

An Aging Life Care Professional, also known as a geriatric care manager, is a health and human services specialist who acts as a guide and advocate for families who are caring for older relatives or disabled adults. The Aging Life Care Professional is educated and experienced in any of several fields related to aging life care / care management, including, but not limited to nursing, gerontology, social work, or psychology, with a specialized focus on issues related to aging and elder care.

The Aging Life Care Professional assists clients in attaining their maximum functional potential. The individual’s independence is encouraged, while safety and security concerns are also addressed. Aging Life Care Professionals are able to address a broad range of issues related to the well-being of their client. They also have extensive knowledge about the costs, quality, and availability of resources in their communities.

Aging Life Care Professionals become the “coach” and families or clients the “team captain,” giving families the time to focus on relationships rather than the stress. In Raleigh, Durham, and surrounding area, contact Raleigh Geriatric Care Management, an Aging Life Care member.


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Filed under adult children of aging parents, Adult day care, aging drivers, Aging In Place, aging life care association, aging life care professional, alcohol and seniors, Alzheimer's Disease, anxiety and the elderly, assessments, bathing and seniors, care giving, care planning, caregiver burnout, caregiving, caregiving and the holidays, dementia, Depression and the elderly, driving retirement, elder care raleigh nc, elder nutrition, eldercare, employee stress, family meetings, Geriatric Care Management, Having a conversation, humor, laughter in caregiving, Long Term Care Insurancee, long term care planning, medication reminders, moving in with family, NC, Nursing Homes, nursing homes and assisted living, paying for home care, Power of Attorney, Raleigh, respite, Sandwich Generation, senior care, senior driving, Seniors and driving, sibling relationships, support groups, travel with seniors

Older Adults and Alcohol

A national 2008 survey found that about 40 percent of adults ages 65 and older drink alcohol. Older adults can experience a variety of problems from drinking alcohol, especially those who:

• Take certain medications
• Have health problems
• Drink heavily

There are special considerations facing older adults who drink, including:

Increased Sensitivity to Alcohol
Aging can lower the body’s tolerance for alcohol. Older adults generally experience the effects of alcohol more quickly than when they were younger. This puts older adults at higher risks for falls, car crashes, and other unintentional injuries that may result from drinking.

Increased Health Problems
Certain health problems are common in older adults. Heavy drinking can make these problems worse, including:

• Diabetes
• High blood pressure
• Congestive heart failure
• Liver problems
• Osteoporosis
• Memory problems
• Mood disorders

Bad Interactions with Medications
Many prescription and over-the-counter medications, as well as herbal remedies can be dangerous or even deadly when mixed with alcohol. Medications that can interact badly with alcohol include:

• Aspirin
• Acetaminophen
• Cold and allergy medicine
• Cough syrup
• Sleeping pills
• Pain medication
• Anxiety or depression medicine

Drinking Guidelines for Older Adults
Adults over age 65 who are healthy and do not take medications should not have more than:

• 3 drinks on a given day
• 7 drinks in a week

Drinking more than these amounts puts people at risk of serious alcohol problems.

If you have a health problem or take certain medications, you may need to drink less or not at all.

Source: NIH National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism

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Helping Children Understand Alzheimer’s

By  Michael Plontz

Your loved one has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s.  The first thing you want to do is find out all you can about the disease, and all about what you can do to take care of your loved one.  It’s a bitter pill to swallow, but, at least you’re an adult and you can understand what’s happening.  What about your children?  How can you help them cope?

The way in which Alzheimer’s may affect children has to do largely with their relationship with the person before.  If they are close to the loved one, the mentally debilitating illness could cause fear, anger, sadness, and confusion.  If the loved one is living in the home of the caregiver, it can cause these feelings to intensify.

Fear is usually the first emotion to surface.  From the fear of their grandparent or other loved one arises feelings of anger, guilt, and jealousy.  All of these feelings can lead to sadness and even depression.  Also, feelings of despair and helplessness may result from the loss of the loving relationship between child and loved one.

The best thing you can do for your child or teenager is to be completely honest and keep the lines of communication open.  If children don’t understand, they could act out by doing badly in school or withdrawing or becoming impatient with their loved one.  Physical or psychosomatic ailments such as stomachaches or headaches may manifest themselves as well.  They may have to be reminded several times that Alzheimer’s is a disease, and that the disease is what’s affecting grandma or grandpa.

It is helpful to have answers ready for an inquisitive child’s difficult questions.  The following questions are just the tip of the iceberg, but it’s a start.

Q – Is grandma crazy?

A – No. Alzheimer’s is a disease. Older adults are prone to illnesses that may make them forget things or act differently.

Q – Is it my fault?

A – Certainly not.  If grandma told you that, it is just the disease talking.

Q – Can I, or my mom or dad catch Alzheimer’s disease?

A – Alzheimer’s is not contagious, so, no, you can’t catch it like you would a cold.

Q – What will happen next?

A – Here the parent must judge how much information the child can handle.  The best thing to do is reassure them that you love them mo matter what happens.

With teenagers the questions will probably be a bit more complicated.  They can see things from different perspectives.  The best thing to do is to inquire about how they’re feeling, and what can be done to make them feel better.  Regardless of the age of the child, open communication is the key to success in weathering the Alzheimer’s storm.

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Who’s Most Likely to Feel Caregiver Stress?

~Paula Spencer Scott

Does caregiving actually cause stress? Some surprising new research says no, the real source of the stress lies within the person, not the situation.

After looking at more than 1,200 female caregiving twins, Peter Vitaliano, professor of psychiatry and psychology at the University of Washington, concluded that how stressful caregiving is for you psychologically is more a matter of your genes and your upbringing. Caregiving itself does not cause stress, he says. This new study appears in the Annals of Behavioral Medicine.

Who’s most at risk, according to this research? People who:

  • Have a history of depression. “Like putting salt in a wound,” says Vitaliano.
  • Grew up with parents who showed a lot of avoidance and fear in response to big stressors (like losing a job).
  • Lack resources to help them cope, like social support and finances.

The study also found that caregiving can cause anxiety, which is in turn linked to depression.

This all may sound like splitting hairs. Though this research confirms Vitaliano’s earlier work debunking a causal connection between caregiving and stress, it flies a bit in the face of many, many other studies that link them. There’s even a name for it: caregiver stress syndrome.

This study didn’t specifically look at Alzheimer’s caregiving, whose duration and unique challenges can wear down even the best-adjusted family member. I wonder, would the results look different?

Bottom line: It doesn’t strike me as terribly helpful to be told your stress is the fault of your genes or your family history. If you’re feeling it, you’re feeling it. It’s nobody’s fault — the real question is what to do about it.

File this info in the nice-to-know category. Then go hide in the bathroom for a little deep breathing, a few bites of dark chocolate, and a wish for some respite time to come your way this week.

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Long Distance Caregiving

Carol O’dell

If you’re a long-distance caregiver, then you know the drill. You call all the time. You coordinate care from 400 miles away. You spend long weekends or vacation time visiting your loved one and hoping before you open that door that they’re OK. Worry comes with long-distance caregiving, and so does guilt, but you try really hard to make it work — and you dread the day that won’t be enough.

You are not alone. According to a recent Caring.com poll, nearly one-third of all caregivers do not live with or, in many cases, even near their loved ones. Here’s a look at a few challenges long-distance caregivers face, and tips to help manage care from afar.

Feeling emotionally connected to your family members.

Sometimes phone calls or visits filled with doctor appointments and home chores don’t allow for heart-to-heart talks. As much as there is to cover, make the time to just sit for a few minutes and allow a natural conversation to emerge.

Set up a weekly phone-chat date for the times that you’re apart. Have it at a time when you both can look forward to it and nothing competes. After you discuss some of your “to-do” list items, begin to share something personal about your own life. Ask their advice on something — anything — from the color shoes you should wear to your cousin’s wedding to whether you should get a bigger car. Let them feel as if they’re a part of your life as well.

Getting shut out.

Many long-distance caregivers, particularly those helping someone with moderate to severe dementia, find that their visits actually aggravate their loved ones — who are confused and want to “go home” or don’t understand why you keep calling them “Dad.”

Remind yourself that you’re not just there to visit. You’re there to make sure Mom or Dad are being cared for properly. (Having a loved one with moderate to severe dementia increases the likelihood that he or she is living in a care facility.) Stay out of sight if you have to, but visit the staff, have lunch in the cafeteria, and walk the grounds. Talk to the people your loved one interacts with to find out how he or she is doing. It’s painful not to be able to connect, but remember that you’re still needed.

Knowing your loved one is safe and appropriately cared for.

Audrey Adelson, author of “Long-Distance Caregiving,” writes, “Often, long-distance caregivers obtain important information from their elder or secondhand from family members who have spoken with a member of their loved one’s treatment team. This makes it difficult to get a clear understanding of what is really going on.” How do you stay in the loop when you’re not in the area?

How to manage? By having lots of eyes. Whether you coordinate care for your loved one in his or her home or an assisted living facility, start to connect with those who interact with your loved one. Call after an appointment and ask how it went. Let them know you plan to be involved, and be sure to send a thank-you card or friendly e-mail.

Managing insurance and financial needs or making sure you can trust those who do.

Trust is a big issue for long-distance caregivers. When you don’t have people who genuinely care for your loved one and communicate with you about what’s going on, then you begin to worry, and worry, and worry.

Take the time to find professionals who can assist you and your loved one. It’s worth the time and effort. Hire an elder law attorney to make sure their financial assets are protected, or check into local resources designed for seniors and their family’s needs.

Make a plan for whatever comes next.

Long-distance caregivers dread getting “the call.” Whether it’s from a concerned neighbor or from the ER at 4 a.m., it’s difficult to know what to plan for when anything could happen. Try to laugh (or scream, or sob) when all of your planning and hard work takes a dive and you have to come up with a new plan. Change is inevitable, and when we fight that it that causes us pain.

Play “what if.” Come up with the three possible scenarios — a fall, a worsening of a condition or ailment, or a refusal to move even when that’s needed. How will you handle it? Can you go ahead and do some online searches? Can you connect with other caregivers and ask how they handled a big change and ask how it’s going now? It’s easier to face the “what ifs” when you know that somehow, some way, you will get through.

Being a long-distance caregiver comes with challenges you never thought you’d have to face. Sometimes you have to let go, just a little, of all that you can’t control. Caregiving isn’t easy, and there aren’t always solutions, so grab your rearview mirror the next time you’re in your car and look at yourself and say, “You’re doing the best you can.”

For a loved one living in Raleigh, NC, contact Raleigh Geriatric Care Management to assist with your family member. www.rgcmgmt.comRaleigh ,NC

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Filed under adult children of aging parents, Adult day care, aging drivers, Aging In Place, Alzheimer's Disease, anxiety and the elderly, assessments, bathing and seniors, care giving, care planning, caregiver burnout, caregiving, caregiving and the holidays, clinical trial studies, dementia, Depression and the elderly, driving retirement, elder care raleigh nc, elder nutrition, employee stress, family meetings, Geriatric Care Management, Having a conversation, humor, Long Term Care Insurancee, long term care planning, medication reminders, moving in with family, NC, Nursing Homes, nursing homes and assisted living, paying for home care, Power of Attorney, Raleigh, respite, Sandwich Generation, senior care, senior driving, Seniors and driving, sibling relationships, support groups, tax tips for seniors, travel with seniors